China’s economy isn’t the only thing getting bigger
Maybe it’s the glassy waters of Asia that make local boys ditch the bulky board shorts and feel closer to nature. Nothing says, "I love the water," like snapping on a pair of skin-tight man panties.
But there's a less liberating side of the barely dressed beach look.
Just as non-voluptuous women at bikini-mandatory spots such as Dino Beach often feel the sting of physical inadequacy, it turns out that men struggle with insecurities related to the dreaded "disappearing act" as they emerge from unforgiving ocean temperatures.
Just in time for summer, a Chinese company has introduced the Male Size-Enhancing Speedo Bulge.
Sold on Taobao.com (in English at Taobaofieldguide.com), this lightweight, one-size-fits-all cup fits snuggly inside a Speedo to re-create the "natural arch" essential to the beach male's sense of potency and well-being.
To avoid an unexpected slip of the sack, each cup is equipped with “bra hooks” that attach to the swimmer-friendly cod-sack.
Gone are the days of creeping out of the water holding close to “an interesting species of seaweed” just to divert attention.
The Male Size-Enhancing Speedo Bulge sells for RMB 53 (about US$8) -- a small price to pay for the confidence “boost.”